I receive a lot of spam. A lot of it. I have spam filters on my spam filters, and I still can't quite filter it all out. Sometimes, it's worth reading though. Not for the stupid things they're selling, but just because it's so funny.

The titles are often the silliest. They try everything: “You never called me back last night!!!” (the do-I-know-you method), “V*agra Has Some STIFF Competition” (the trying-to-be-funny-but-failing method), “Horny Blowjob Site” (the direct method), “helpful septic tank info…………” (the ewwwwww method), “URGENT Time:3:03:58 AM” (the weird-techie-stuff method), “Leon, don't be a turtle” (the surreal method), or perhaps “BIN LADEN DARTBOARD!!!!” (the falling-off-the-chair-laughing method).

To top it all off, I just received spam from Yahoo that started: “Dear NULL,“. I think your scripts need some more work, Yahoo, but thanks for the laughs.

It's official: Blockbuster smells. Blockbuster in London has decided to try adding fragrances in some of its stores to convince customers to rent movies. Gunpowder for actions movies, roses for romances and bananas for comedy. I somehow doubt that the smell of fruit will make me want to hire Police Academy.

If this experiment does work out, however, we can expect movie stores around the globe will be blasting us with strange scents to convince us to part with our money. And that the local grocer's will be stocking a wide selection of Monty Python.

Lookout Segway, after weeks of hype (including speculation that it would allow us to create underwater cities), Danza/WHAT has been relvealed. It is heralded as being “a bold step forward in pedestrian science and engineering”, and I can't wait to get one!

Haughey, Kottke and Meg have outdone themselves this time. I nearly fell off my chair laughing.

We're not sure what secret research is being performed at Area 51, but we do know they're overworking their guards. They're working overtime on their overtime and not getting paid enough for keeping all that… whatever it is safe.

I mean, how would you like to spend day after day defending the Earth from the scum of the universe, and only get paid US$15.05 per hour for it? I'll bet the alien invaders get a better wage than that. And health benefits too. That UFO-flying union is pretty well organised, let me tell you.

Since hi!monkey has been a favourite of mine for a while, I thought I'd mention it. There. I've mentioned it.

Why not spend some time cooking with monkey, reading over monkey's manners tips, or just checking out monkey's encounter with his friends, the Tibetan monks. Such a talented monkey.

Ever since they butchered Psygnosis, I haven't been a big fan of Sony. I didn't think they could annoy me any further. I was so very wrong.

What is wrong with the original, people? They'd better not mess this one up, or I'm going to get really cranky.